||[14 Dec 2006|08:10pm]
Been feeling introspective, and normally I pick up my pen when that happens, but that doesn't bring Thomas thoughts with it. I do so like Thomas thoughts. Last night Aly said 'I can't believe that a year ago I didn't know you. I feel like I've know you all my life'. Which of course, made me very happy to hear, as it would. But it got me thinking. A year ago, I hadn't even met Deirdre yet. I was an unhappy priest preaching things I didn't believe, and what I did believe was that I was the biggest failure since...uhm...someone that failed really lots. And then I realised that even six months ago when I thought I knew my purpose, I wasn't anywhere close.
So how is it now, that I feel so found? Can one person really make that much of a difference? Because I've thought that before and been sorely mistaken. Is it the combination of things all at once (not counting the rather terrifying 'exorcism' that occured yesterday) that means I know where I am supposed to be. I don't know what it is, but I know it's right. Even dreaming of Her hasn't changed that.
Aly suprised me today. She overheard me telling Liz that I wanted to go to Ireland to do some researching on demons (I've known four Irish demons...that's more than any other place. Does that tell you something?) and she got us tickets to go on Monday. Just us. Only for a few days, because we don't want to be gone too long. I don't think there's anyone else in the world that would understand me like she does. Who else would go with me to Ireland to do something like that?
I mean besides you. The only reason I'm hesitant to go is because when I get back you might be gone again, but I know I'll see you soon enough.