|To Those in the Know
||[20 Oct 2007|09:04pm]
So...this morning I realised I am going to be a father again any day now. I know...wake up, Peter. But I finally got used to the fact that Svetlana was pregnant with my child. And soon she won't be anymore. The child will be here. And she's going to be mine and Svetlana's and she won't be with me all the time and I'm going to miss her so much when she's not here. I already do and she's not even born yet. I was away from Lydia for three years and it hurt so much. More than anything ever has. And Rasputina will only be minutes away and I'm still going to hate it.
This is going to be hard.
Meanwhile I'm carrying my mobile with me everywhere just in case Svetlana rings me. I gave her one and so far she's rung me to tell me the phone worked. To test rings. To bring her...various things which Thomas had to bring her anyway because...wheelchair. And to tell me the phone worked again, which...by that point, I was aware of. Every single time, I thought it was baby time! I need to calm down. Like a lot.
Aly suggested Valium. Thanks, Honey.